A running rant about bad television, crappy products, horrible service, mindless politics, corporate and government ineptitude, moronic media, marketing overload, public idiocy, stupid entertainment, etc. Here's what's annoying me today:

4.15.2006

Stupid Warning Labels



I'm being a cranky Easter Bunny right now. I'm sitting here with a couple dozen Play-Doh easter eggs, and they are annoying in so many ways.

First, each one is tightly shrink-wrapped, so I have to sit here with a steak knife unwrapping each one. Why everything has to be sealed that thoroughly is beyond me. And nothing bugs me more than plastic wrapped in plastic.

Second, there is this little white sticker warning label on each one (of course it had to be printed in three languages, but don't get me started on that!) Didn't pay much attention at first, but then I read what it said: Notice to Parents: Contains Wheat.

Now the people who scolded me when I griped about peanut free schools will probably point out that there are kids with wheat allergies. But it's fucking Play-Doh! If little Junior decides to eat it, I'm sure there are a lot worse things in it than fucking wheat!

And by the way, we are using Play-Doh Easter eggs in the first place because my diabetic nephew will be here, and we are being correctly sensitive by not putting candy in them.

Now when I was a kid, the Easter Bunny only hid real eggs, but that's another issue.

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5 Comments:

Blogger Sick of Extremes said...

Oh look mommy, the Easter Bunny left me an egg! Not candy, a real egg. Screw the Easter Bunny! Where's my Hasenpfeffer!!

10:47 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I almost lost a finger trying to open a Kinder Egg surprise with a knife for my son. It's not cough medicine for God's sake it's a kid's flippin toy! Is all of this plastic then recycled? My colleague will now know who wrote this... . This is the best Easter anecdote by far. Denounce the madness - well done again.

10:03 AM

 
Blogger Trustee of Truth said...

What about natural selection? Darwin would roll in his grave. Can't anyone just die and end their blood line for being stupid? Or will lawyers see that stupid fucks are protected thereby heartening the promotion of dim-wittedness!

2:16 PM

 
Blogger Sick of Extremes said...

Look at the Kennedies. Talk about a blood line of dim-wittedness! Oh wait, they have tons of money therefore, they should live forever! As long as someone carries your ass through life, it doesn't matter how stupid you are!

7:56 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Stupid warning labels for people who ae too dumb to look out for themselves

7:48 PM

 

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